Best starter DSLR & kit?

I know, I know....I said I didn't want an slr...but I'm wavering!
Basically, I love my current compact (Panasonic Lumix TX8) and for what it is it's brilliant! It's helped me get to grips with manual and I'm happy with the quality of the pictures...for a compact. But I look at other pictures, mainly on here, and am dreaming of a day when I can take pictures like those.
My husband has just found me looking up 2nd hand and refurbished dslr websites online and he's said IF he passes his probation period at work (it's touch and go sadly) then we'll talk about getting a dslr!!!! I'm actually very excited about this

Firstly, which body is considered the best for starting out with slr's? I've heard good things about Nikon and Canon. How many lenses (and which ones) would I need? I mainly would like to take portaits (both people and animals), macro and action shots (running dogs and children).....any hints/tips? I'd also like a decent zoom, the different mm amounts confuse me as so far I've only used the x zoom system...

It's still only a pipe dream, but perhaps could be a reality and would like to research now, any help appreciated

A second hand Nikon D40 with the kit lens (18-55) and a 55-200mm lens would be a great starter kit at a very good price

All the major brands are pretty good - go for what feels right in your hands

To be honest you can't go far wrong these days with any DSLR but kicking off with Nikon or Canon would be my tip.

Not only will you have access to the widest range of compatible lenses and accessories but you'll also benefit from discussing photography with people who have the same kit.

Unfortunately 'Canon v Nikon' takes up more column inches in magazines and web threads than just about any other subject. As Azz says - just go and get a feel for what feels right for you.

Despite having the same specifications - DSLR's classed as 'entry level' tend to be much smaller, lighter and less robust than those classed as 'enthusiast'. It's easy to get wrapped up in specs but build quality counts for a lot if you're out and about using your camera day in day out.

As for a lens....

If landscapes were your thing I'd have suggested you simply went for a 'kit' lens but if portraits, kids, pets, (in action) are your thing and funds allow - it may be worth considering a 'faster' lens when you buy the camera as you may get a better deal than changing your lens at a later date.

I was thinking of a Nikon D40, heard it's a good starter camera. What's the difference between a 18-55 and a 55-200? I'm still learning the numbers. Would they be good for macro, action and portrait?

Yeah, I'm not big on scenery often because I never get to any. I only take occasional shots. I'm mainly about macro, action and portraits How do I know if it's a 'faster' lens?

Lenses with larger apertures tend to be referred to as 'fast' lenses.

Because they allow more light to enter the camera you can use faster shutter speeds (good for action) whilst still getting a properly exposed image.

The maximum aperture is represented as an F number on the lens. F2.8 would be what most people deem to be fast on a standard zoom lens however an F2.8 lens would generally be larger, heavier and cost more than an equivalent F4 lens.

In addition to the speed - another characteristic of a wide aperture is the ability to give you a shallow depth of focus. This is where you see your subject in focus and your background blurred - something you might want to achieve with portraits.

Thanks, very helpful description